A year ago, I was talking to an old gardiner, who had to give up work.
He had a heart condition, resulting in a valve operation.

Some of the resulting symptoms were a dimming of vision.
Fading and falling into a heap. Great stuff if one is driving, I said.

I see Autism in everyone and everything. The computer is my obsession.

He said “For things to thrive,
one must feed them and provide a suitable environment".
But sometimes things go wrong. The environment is not always friendly,
but somehow they survive anyway.
They may not develop properly, but they are still survivors.
Who are we, to take away their life or reality.

What he said, made sense to me,
because trying to make sense of things, takes up most of my time.

To me, that old Gardiner with a faulty heart, knew more about Autism than I did.
He was talking about watering the plants,
supplying a self-watering system that would make the plants thrive.

Dr Goldberg talks about the restricted blood flow, in the Autistics brain.
He is trying to increase flow capability with drugs, a good idea from his view.

Mr Gardiner said, "Restricting the supply of food and water, things just don't thrive".

The Gardiner talked about his symptoms. His dimmed vision, post operation.
My cog wheels turned and a light came on.
I had a head-on car accident years ago. I remember - 2pm
The sun seemed very dark? My vision was probably down, like late at night.
Maybe I was depressed? Could that cause it? or perhaps I forgot my meals?
Perhaps I blacked out or faded away?

I suffer from Chronic Fatigue and also lots of other syndromes.
To do anything at all, requires on my part obsessive behaviour.
Perhaps I wasn't paying attention, tuned out, of my environment.
I do have adult ADHD also.

I saw a research document years ago suggesting a link between
sloppy HEART VALVES (which don't show up as a heart murmur) and
CHRONIC FATIGUE, which no-one knows the CAUSE of, just like Autism.

On reflection, it would appear, sloppy or affected heart valves, could
CAUSE poor circulation etc. (resulting in many of my symptoms)

‘Autists’ often struggle, like me, to raise their hands above their head.
Some are known to be in continual repetitive ‘stim’ motion.
My favourite "coping" is to walk in little circles.
It helps me think and clears my head

Poor circulation to the brain may be the cause of many Autistic symptoms.

Symptoms are the body’s way of expressing ‘coping’ or ‘repair’ IMO.
This accounts for many of the survival strategies
that many employ to alleviate or help their condition.

To suppress ‘symptoms’ is something , the ‘Medical people’,
in recent history have blindly adopted,
without any scientific or logical basis for it.
This is the basis for Modern (Symptom only) medicine.

So what is the “Cure”?
I tried CHANGE. It was like head butting a brick wall and
change for an Autistic family is hard, very hard.

I tried even saying “HI” to people. (Ie. imitating normal). It’s like
being dosed in petrol, they are smiling, coming closer with a match.
That is what it feels like. (A touch of panic on a bad day)
If I ignore them, will they go away? “Look at me!” (eye contact)
If I talk to them enough, perhaps I can stop them talking back so
I'll remain in control.
Even someone holding hands on B&W TV, I have to leave the room.
You don't seem to forget anything, with emotion.
Paranoia and the fear of doing anything, also exists.

That is why I have failed my son. I have wasted time on my obsession
with this computer, in order to survive, till now.

I will now attempt to give him, what I think he needs,
my TIME, the most valuable thing in the universe.
Also a safe space, to survive in.

Am stressed out with son’s new School environment and trying to cope
by echoing my thoughts and walking round and round in small circles.
It’s the only thing that seems to help. Well it clears the mind.
I get confused when I don’t have enough sleep.

http://3service.freeservers.com/autism.html
Neil Clark from New-Zealand